A little bit of This "n" That

A Nasty Affair.

I’m strong, confident , 31, single and I live alone.

I frequently go out socially into nightspots such as Northbridge, Mount Lawley , Leederville,  Subiaco and more.

I regularly catch cabs on my own, go out running through my neighbourhood which is extremely well lit on my own, and have been known to walk home from some nightspots on my own.

I’m always vigilant of my surroundings and constantly let my friends and people I know where I am headed. I never leave a night out without telling those around me that I’m going home.  I also let them know once I’ve gotten home that I’m there safely.

As a single woman, I am constantly preached to about security and safety. I’m not stupid and I’m aware of what can happen. The situation over the weekend involving the disappearance of Jill Meagher is a grim but also real event. This happens not only to well-known journalists, but also to everyday women.

No matter what you do you will, and I am being honestly frank about this always find in every city there is a display of potential threat to the wellbeing and safety of all women no matter how many precautions you take. You cannot say that one city is safer than the other,  the threat is always in our midst.

You may think I’m rambling a little and want me to get to the point. To get to that point I have to tell you  about what happened to me this weekend just passed.

I have lived in my current ground floor apartment for Four and a Half years.  Apart from the occasional meth head doing a bit of a wander by, which is always to be expected  when you choose to do the whole “Inner City Living” I have never felt unsafe or at risk in my own home. This changed on Saturday Night.

After catching up with friends, I made my way home early (8.30 to be precise) and decided a night in was required. I had a cigarette outside, came back in, closed my glass sliding door popped the lock , put my pyjamas on and wrapped myself in my duvet on my sofa. The inside light was on and I absent-mindly forget to pull my blinds down. I fell asleep.

At 12.30 I woke up, for no reason whatsoever and  just looked up to the back door. I thought I was having a nightmare. A man stood within a foot of the door, completely naked. Wearing some form of mask with only his eyes exposed and a Kangol Flat cap, he was furiously masturbating.  I was petrified.

I couldn’t scream, I tried to shout telling him I was going to call the Police. He spoke back “ I’ve been here for half an hour already, what’s the point. I’m going to get you”. He continued to keep going with his act whilst I tried to close the blind, grab my phone and lock myself in my bedroom.

I have no idea where he went. To get to my garden this lunatic had to find exactly where to go through a large car park and walk past SIX other ground floor apartments before getting to mine.

You may laugh and think, “Oh yeah, some crazy getting his kicks on by exposing himself Blah Blah Blah etc” . But he had locked his eyes with mine and threatened me, for all I knew he hadn’t run off but could have been hiding anywhere in the complex. Even worse, he could live there. I don’t know. There are 40 Apartments.

The police attended the scene and a report was made, I was questioned as to whether the individual appeared to be armed . I found it very specific and after asking more questions I then found out this was not the only time this had happened. In the past MONTH there had been several incidents reported, and the discussion was had that there may have been ones that weren’t reported.

I have seen nothing in the local press about any such incidents. Nothing has been issued out to any Media Outlets that I know about the incident on the weekend. I was told that this was being treated very seriously, because of the nature of the act along with the threat. The responsibility here should be that the Police Force should be creating an awareness within the community about this especially where a large population of  single women  live.

How do I have faith that this individual will be caught?

I don’t .

Also I now do not want to go out in the dark on my own anywhere, not even to take the rubbish out to the bins. Which is goddam ridiculous and nobody , whether you are male or female should have to continually question how safe it is do go about your normal daily routine.

This includes catching up with friends down the pub, at their houses  and so forth. I understand Jill Meagher’s intention of walking home was that she did it all the time and the route was known to her. That doesn’t mean it stops the stranger invading your route or following you home.

I’m not here to lecture anyone. I hate to think what could have happened if my door wasn’t locked, But it didn’t. These things happen. My confidence has been knocked and  I’m scared, BUT I will move forward and try to not let it eat me inside. I would make the worst recluse.

Do me a favour guys and girls, when your friends ask to walk you home say “Yes”, or share that cab.

Being vigilant doesn’t mean you have to change your lifestyle.


* For those of you that live in the West Perth / Leederville / North Perth  area or have friends please warn them.

Description* 5’10 Caucasian Male, Blue Eyes, Stocky / Medium Build – Slightly Hairy . No Identifying Tattoos. Could be bald Unsure due to him wearing a hat. Police have said that he may have stashed a backpack containing  Screwdriver / Flashlight, Tape  and his clothes somewhere nearby. If you hear or see this man Please contact the Police immediately.


Comments on: "A Nasty Affair." (41)

  1. What a fucking creep. Hope I meet him.

  2. Aunty Penny said:

    Hoooooolllllyyyyy shiiiiiiit!!!! That would have been terrifying!

  3. Holy hell, that’s scary and I’m not surprised that your confidence has been knocked. I’m glad the police are taking it seriously but the media should be alerted to it, so MORE people are aware of it happening. Take care of yourself x

  4. I’ve had something similar happen on two occasions when I was younger, travelling and sleeping in my car at the beach and at a rest stop. It took me months until my heart didn’t race anytime I was alone somewhere dark, until I didn’t feel like running at any little sound or shadow. You start to feel safer again in time. I’ve been more cautious since, but you sound as though you already were.

  5. Bah apologies about that I hit enter too soon. Anthony Tran linked to this from my Facebook page. Was quite startled to read about what happened. Glad you’re ok. Takes guts to put something like this out there.

    I work at the suburban paper in Joondalup, but will pass this on to our crew at the Guardian which covers the West Perth/Leederville/North Perth area. I’m surprised it hasn’t already been covered. Hopefully it will help get the word out.

  6. Gosh, I am so glad you are ok x

  7. You’re going to let some mentally unstable person, who obviously needs to be treated by professionals and rehabilitated, limit your behaviour with fear and dread?

    Take the shock factor away from this story, and realise that this was an upfront, intentionally provoking and personal encounter. The police (hopefully) will catch this person soon, but will it be soon enough?

    I think people need to assert their dominance over such situations and let the offender know that “NO, I am not your typical damsel in distress, your actions are not acceptable and I WILL act”. Grab your weapon of choice (voice, posture, show no fear etc) and scare the person off to the point where they’re not going to come anywhere near you again. This person obviously plans this and does this regularly, for the simple fact that no one has stood up to the behaviour.

    This is your house, your bedroom, your personal space. You can block it out and let someone else handle it, or you can face the matter at hand. I know what I would do!

    • Andy, you cannot tell someone how they should react to something after the fact. You cannot tell someone what “you would’ve done” while you’re typing from your chair.

      Personally I’m trained in a few different forms of self defense. Boxing, Muay Thai, Krav Maga, wrestling and Jiu Jitsu. I chose these disciplines because of their real world applications. Despite years of training, the threat of the unknown, is always terrifying. I’m lucky because I have the training to deal with such circumstances, but 99% of people out there don’t have that kind of training.

      This situation is a terrifying one to comprehend. To wake up and see that would have shook anyone, despite big and brave you’d like to pretend to be. I had a situation a couple months ago when I heard someone trying to break in while I was asleep. I laid there for a minute listening intently hoping with all my heart that I was wrong. I was petrified. I heard glass break, grabbed a machete that I keep by my bed for such occurrences and walked out to the kitchen ready for the encounter. The burglar had broken a pane of glass on a door and was reaching through trying to unlock the door but couldn’t (always use deadlocks). I grabbed his wrist and held the machete above it and told him he’s going to lose his hand, that he was lucky he hadn’t gotten in because he would have lost his head. He tore his hand away, slicing himself up on the broken glass as he pulled away and ran for his life. I was shaken. I am scared to walk outside and put my rubbish out but I can still function normally because I’m trained to.

      The Police got his DNA from the blood he left and arrested him for aggregated burglary. He had been arrested for similar offences before.

      The point is, that type of occurance scares anyone. Especially someone living alone. I’m scared to go for a run because he might be waiting until I’m more vulnerable, I just don’t know. But I still go for a run, albeit using more caution.

      Do yourself a favour Andy, until you encounter something similar, don’t try and lecture people about how they should have reacted to it because you’re so big and strong and you reckon you would’ve handled it better.

    • What ever Bruce lee

  8. Well, this is adequately terrifying…

  9. Andy Hudson said:

    Hello Soia,

    I hope I remember the name right from the beginning of your text. It reads like a thriller, this kind of book you read, you’re shitting yourself and you don’t wanna sleep without the curtain closed. I don’t know why I have never paid to much attention before to realities like yours, like anyone’s. I am 34, male, strong build (training for the ironman at the moment, achieved a brown belt in Karate and achieved the title of German master in boxing for a underaged) and I am married. I’ve followed the events around Jill from the beginning. As a grown average strong man it has left me in a stage of disbelieve. It’s not about “it could have been my wife” it’s about fuck that’s happen to a human being. To be honest my first thought was f*** that could have been your Bibi (my wife). But the sadness remains knowing that it was someone else’s beloved ones. I don’t thing the police is to blame as I thing they doing their job as good as they can. A apartment block of 40 units, why can’t they stick together? I’m not a religious person but I still think your next door neighbor should be a friend. 40 people in one building, if everyone gets a bit of a “we care about each other” feeling it would be such a support…

  10. Thanks for sharing your story with us. This is truly awful and disgusting. It makes me shudder.

  11. Andy – If faced with the option of finding a weapon & fighting off a stalker & possibly getting fatally injured because of it, or running & hiding until they go away/police come, I know which option I would choose. Soia: I am SO GLAD you are ok. *hugs*

  12. I have heard multiple stories about this exact same guy. A few women at the Robertson Reserve park have mentioned him.
    What a creep!

  13. Just_a_ guy said:

    He didn’t try to break in did he? Sounds like he’s a voyeuristic wanker, and it’s quite possible that’s all he is in to. The experience would be scarey and uncomfortable, but it doesn’t mean he was (necessarily) intent on physically assault.

    • This may be the case. But the discussions had with the police is that he has been know to carry items that could cause physical harm. The idea may just be creepy to some and others may just fob it off. But realistically there is nothing to say this could not escalate into a different situation where the victim could be harmed.This is why I have written about what happened, to hopefully increase the awareness of those that live near me or within the areas surrounding and for them to become more vigilant when it comes down to their personal safety.

      • These offences are taken very very seriously by the police because they often precede more violent sexual based crime. It’s an established pattern of behaviour. The police seem well aware of this guy now so I really hope he is caught. Hopefully he doesn’t escalate before that occurs. I’m very glad to hear your story and applaud you for your bravery. It makes me think what I would do. I really should go do that self defense class I always say I’m going to do one day.

  14. I’m extremely happy to hear that you’re okay and that it’s under investigation.

    I’m a 6 odd foot tall guy with years of martial arts training and if this happened to me I’d also be terrified. It’s good that the police are already aware of the guy and I know that there’s a lot of unusual happenings all over the place but this is just shocking so they better bloody catch him.

    “Police have said that he may have stashed a backpack containing Screwdriver / Flashlight, Tape and his clothes somewhere nearby. If you hear or see this man Please contact the Police immediately.”

    That bit there is especially creepy, why on earth would you need a screwdriver and tape nearby in this situation if you didn’t have some seriously weird intentions?

  15. […] That’s when I read the disturbing blog post by Michelle Soia, A Nasty Affair. […]

  16. Jasmin Franceschi said:

    So glad you’re ok babe. I’ve never been in that situation so I don’t know exactly what to say or even if any advice would help. But thank you for sharing this and making more people aware . Take care x

  17. Lol near all make replies to this story all include ” I’m a well trained martial artist” haha talk it up, as if yous are but I hope saying it makes you all feel big and tough, and you think your the man now.

  18. Bonkers – hope you are ok lady x

  19. Soia thank you for sharing your story. I’ve passed in on to friends who live in the area.
    I’ve caught someone in my house before and it is terrifying. On the plus side (and it didn’t feel like a plus side at the time) the guy never came back and my knickers stopped being stolen).
    That you managed to speak to the attacker is incredible- after all, it can be (I presume unless you’ve had specific training) impossible to know whether you have a freeze/flight or fight response to that sort of situation.
    If there is anything you think of anything further that can be done (aside from the important step of raising awareness about the attacker) I am interested in helping- if possible.
    Thank you again.

  20. Oh and I can’t believe I didn’t say this in my first post I am truly pleased that you are alright.

  21. Just saw the report on Channel 10 – thank you for getting the word out there to everyone in Perth about this serious matter and I hope you (and others) never go through this again.

  22. This is just terrifying, I’m so glad you’re OK. Thank you for letting us know this is happening, we all need to be extra vigilant and careful. Take care of you chick. A xx

  23. Your story is being talked about. I heard it from people I was working with today. I was chilled to the bone. I am so glad that you weren’t hurt. Thank you so much for your courage for telling it and letting everyone know about it.

    Stay safe.

  24. I’m very sorry this happened to you. Complete and utterly scary! I am a female but do not live alone. However I am still very aware of the threats and dangers. Just because I live with someone doesn’t mean the threat for a home invasion isn’t there. I have not read all the comments so I’m not sure if this was offered already.. You should install cameras on your back patio and also if you have a peep-hole you can install a camera there. Better to be safe than sorry and most people aren’t suspecting they will be caught on camera so you never know if he comes back you will have his image for police.

  25. It is very terrifying that this happens 😦

    I’m glad that you are able to write about it to warn others.

  26. Quote “nobody , whether you are male or female should have to continually question how safe it is do go about your normal daily routine.”

    Sorry, I disagree. In my opinion, routines are the bane of safety, if you have a pattern then it is much easier to be tracked. I also think that one should never drop their guard with strangers or near strangers. Not that makes any difference, since one of the concepts in criminology is that most deliberate assaults and murders are performed on victims by people they know. Add a certain amount of paranoia to your “routine”, you’ll be safer.

  27. Wow. That’s completely creepy. Reasons like that (well, kind of reasons like that) are why I never feel comfortable living on a ground level apartment. I almost always have to live where the only “real” point of entry is the front door; thus meaning I have a balcony and not a ground floor patio. Consider that my own form of paranoia and security, disregarding someone could likely scale the wall to get to my balcony.

    That’s also why I ALWAYS walk my guests to their cars, particularly female, regardless of the hour they are leaving and they are alone. As much as I trust the area and where I live…we sadly just don’t know what could happen.

  28. This happened to me and my roomate, we live in West Perth an we followed this up The police and they mentioned they could not do much seeing as he had a hat and we could not see his face. Although the disceiption we gave was not stocky, but a Caucasian that was wearing a terry towling hat, he had a bit of a belly and “old” arms, we described him to seem like an old looking man that may actually be younger. He did not tell out to us because we could not even speak, but it happened two doors down from us and he yelled out to her. This is a terrible event to go through, I hope you are ok, it has been two months and we get back to our routines and then this happens. I really hope that the police make this a priority it just has to stop.

    • WOW. I think it’s just so difficult for them to track him down, they have said the description has varied across the whole area .

      • Liz Koota said:

        I know, they also mentioned in Subiaco someone said it was a dark skinned male… I for one hope this is the same person although we just remember different descriptions…. However we have obviously been extra cautious since this instance and have reported someone who matches our description living around the corner from us, this person seemed “odd” meaning he covered his face when walking past a couple, he also seemed to be drunk… he has a trench coat on and massive aviators on… Now we at first thought if this was the wrong person then we would feel terrible that we accused someone. But this has got to stop, we reported this particular person to the police and they mentioned they will follow this up.

        When you say stocky did you find him to be quite fit? Or just a bit big? The lady two doors down said she said him to be “short and stumpy” and a big smile… (large mouth). We had to tell her to report this occurrence so I can’t imagine how many people it may have happened to.

      • Bizarre. I’ve tried not to really go out walking around even in the day. My car has been my sanctuary to get out and about in plus seeing friends who I’ve been hanging out with. Also I dropped you an email if you want to chat via that instead x

  29. julie petersen said:

    My neice and I were sitting in her lounge in Bull Creek last Thursday night when a man smashed through the front window with a hammer he was wearing a balaclava we ran into her bedroom and locked the door ,unfortunately leaving the phone in the lounge …..he robbed the place then disapeared ,Thank God I was there for her , now she is too scared to stay there…. he was black ….about 5 ft 3 ” wearing a balaclava……. Ps I live in west perth in a block of flats 2nd story ( thank God ) I would go for weeks without even shuting the balcony door but in the last few months have been feeling uneasy about leaving my door open thanks for sharing must have been terrifing

  30. This happened to me and recently. I can’t see how he will get caught – he has continue to do this numerous times. It is only a matter of time befoe his behavior escalates

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